Letting Go and Acceptance

Welcome to my new blog, Getting Me back.

This blog is vastly different from Monsters Ed and all about me and my journey back to myself. This blog will hopefully evolve as I do. This blog will not be as active as Monsters Ed as these post are going to be hard to write and even harder to publish. My hope is that this blog will help and inspire others who are stuck in a loop like me, to find their way out.

This past year has taught me to love myself and letting go of the person I was and thought I was meant to be. This is my journey to self-love (harder than one might think), my struggle with depression and anxiety, dealing with my past, putting my relationship with my husband first, working on being the best mother I can be and making lasting, real relationships with my family and friends. Tall order, no? Oh yes, life isn’t easy and living a full, healthy life is even harder!

I know “Let It Go” from Frozen is probably the most hated Disney song in the history of movie sound tracks, but listening to the lyrics has always brought tears to my eyes and occasionally the ugly cry.

I have realised this year that I have held on to way too much, for lack of a better word, stuff from my past and it has held me back from being the person I truly am, whoever that may be. This realisation hit me hard a few months ago and I started making small changes to myself.

When I became a stay at home mother 9 years ago, I let myself go physically. I stopped dressing nicely (ie anything other than ratty old shirts hubby no longer wears and PJ pants or an old pair of shorts), doing my hair and makeup and just generally let my appearance go. There is no good reason for it, other than laziness. Oh my hat, that was hard to admit.

I recently started going once a month to have my nails done, without the kidlets! What a difference that one small detail has made to my confidence. I went and spent 3 hours getting my hair cut and coloured at a professional hair salon for the first time and let them pamper me the entire time (this is something I will be doing once every 2 months). I even started wearing makeup every time I leave the house. Make up is not something our circle of friends have ever seen me wear. I have slowly started buying cloths that actually fit and are pretty. I have had a few people ask me if I’m having an affair, THAT’S how drastic these 3 little changes have made an impact on my appearance. This bugged me terribly in the beginning and I usually had a snarky response. It took me a time, or six, to realise that this was, in actual fact, a complement and that people were not being serious. The reason for my initial reaction will, most probably, come out at some point.

Thank you for stopping by. I’ll be posting as often as is possible.

Much love….